By: Susan Clark Armstrong ––

Singer songwriter Willie Nelson has a way with ballads. Besides counseling momma’s not to let their babies grow up to be cowboys, there’s other wisdom in his refrains. After writing about politics and politicians for almost 28 years, I have found Willie to be a thoughtful muse. In Willie’s song “Hands on the Wheel” there’s a stanza that pretty much describes all politicians. Willie sings:

“There’s deceivers and believers and ole in-betweeners that seem to have no place to go.”

Like the little pockets of Americana and the big one that picks ours, Clay County has all three.

The deceivers are the elected, appointed and anointed who lie to us, steal from us and at least one used our money to buy panties for his girlfriends. I won’t mention any names, since we’ve all sinned and come short of the glory…although most of us didn’t do the coming short with taxpayer money.

The believers are good public servants who do their darndest to represent us in honest, compassionate and trustworthy ways. We have some believers in our local government.

And we certainly have our in-betweeners…those who sit the fence so much, their tantes must stay raw. They have to wait to see which way the proverbial wind is blowing to see how they are going to vote. Even then, they still have their fingers in the air.

Lots of important stuff in our county is decided by the DBIs, so it’s up to us to know exactly who’s doing the deciding, what they’re deciding, and who’s buttering their bread to get the deciding done.

The deciders that need to be watched nowadays is the Charter Review Commission (CRC). A CRC meets every four years. Our County Commissioners choose the members of the CRC. Some members are good folks. Some are special interests and suck up to the commissioners to be appointed. The CRC members’ job is, supposedly, to think up stuff that is good for our county. Then they take their ideas to the commissioners. If the commission likes their suggestions, they begin the process to put them on the ballot for a vote. That process costs us oodles of money.

Initially, lawyers spend their pricey time choosing just the right words to describe the amendment that goes on our election ballot. The right words often times seem intentionally confusing. Next, more money is spent for advertising in the media and on mailouts to convince us to vote the CRC way.

There is a harder way to get something on the ballot for the voters. It’s called the Citizens’ Initiative. This happens when regular county folks recognize a need, organize, and then work for long periods of time to get voters to sign thousands of petitions. When successful, the folks have to foot the bills for all costs to put the amendment on the ballot.

In the past, I have known people on the CRC that made me want to hold my purse close and wear double crosses around my neck. This time I know folks on this CRC or I have stalked their Facebooks. Most are, or seem to be, decent people. One’s a mathematical genius. So, that makes me wonder how they came up with two amendments that undo what the citizens of Clay County wanted and already voted to do.

History

A few years back we had some commissioners that had moved right into their daddies’ or uncles’ chairs on the commission and stayed put. Turned out a few were deceivers. Along with a deceptive public works director, commissioners set us back years financially and shamed us in front of the legal community and the whole state. The commissioners had also been giving themselves obscene yearly raises. Their part-time salaries were larger than those of any county commission with the same population in the whole state. They were paying themselves a little over $64,500 a year. Their salaries and assorted benefits, not including all the food they could eat at the Fair Board Luncheons, came to approximately $88,000 a year…for part-time jobs.

A group of smart, hard-working county residents called the Citizens for Terms Limits and Accountability Committee (CTLAC) organized and put citizens’ initiatives on the ballot to term limit the commissioners to eight-years and drop their salaries to $37,000…still a lot for a part-time gig. We overwhelmingly voted “yes” to both, but let them keep the Fair Food.

Approximately four years ago, a CRC, via the commission, put an amendment to limit our elected constitutional officials to three four-years terms, twelve years. Our constitutionals are Clerk of Court, Property Appraiser, Sheriff, Supervisor of Elections, and Tax Collector. Although we thought eight was enough, we were only offered twelve and took what we got. We voted “yes.”

Obviously, some of the Undoers on today’s CRC think we either weren’t smart enough back then or spent too much time at the Spindrifter bar to cast a thoughtful vote. Members of the CRC said it’s time to forgive the sins of the past and undo our votes.

The CRC wants to give the part-time commissioners more money, maybe bump them back up to the days of shame and give them yearly raises. I bet lots of folks would love to be shamed with $37,000 a year for a part-time job, plus great retirement and other benefits; especially those full-time county employees that are making less than the part-timer commissioners and haven’t gotten a raise in years.

The CRC Undoers also wants to do away with the twelve year term-limits for constitutionals and let them to stay in office ‘til they die.

The CRC’s reason to pay commissioners more money and undo the term-limits for the constitutionals is so that we can get more qualified people to run for office in Clay County. Go ahead, snort laugh at this one. I did.

First, there are always lots of people running for every office in our county. Second, the only “quality” that is demanded to run for any office in our county is to be 18 years old, a registered voter and not be a crook…or at least be caught and convicted of the crookery.

Lots of us think we presently have some of the best commissioners ever to sit on the dais. The ones I know have real full-time jobs and are happy to do their part-time jobs at the current salary and great benefits.

Frankly, most all of our constitutional officers start out with no experience in their elected positions and some continue to bumble through for years. If we need brain surgeons for these jobs, then we need to change the process to hire the constitutionals, not elect them. Those who think they are qualified to be paid the very large salaries, tremendous retirement benefits, and expenses the constitutionals receive, could submit a résumé to the county manager and apply for the positions. The manager could verify their experience and do a crook check. Then, the commission and community can decide if they get the job. If they turn out to be deceivers, we can show ‘em the door instead of spending tons of time and money to recall them or look the other way while they get re-elected.

Some folks say we don’t need term-limits for the constitutionals because we already have them at the ballot box. However, office holders often win over more qualified challengers. And our constitutionals actually campaign for free the whole time they’re in office. They call it “public service” when they use our money to inform us, brag on themselves, get their names and pictures in the newspaper and on social media so that we recognize them at the grocery store. Even if their employees know they are bumbling, they still get elected because of name recognition.

As evidenced by our previous votes, we believe that if eight years is good enough for our president, Florida cabinet, state legislators and commissioners, then 12 years for our constitutionals is a gift. If you need proof that all elected officials need to be term-limited, just look at all parties of congress in Washington, D.C.

It seems the only person who needs some know-how for their job in this county is our sheriff. And we now have a great sheriff. We’ve already had a couple of deceiver sheriffs who knew little about the law and a lot about women’s undergarments.

To be fair, not all members of the CRC are Undoers. Nevertheless, some on the CRC still want the commissioners to waste our money and put their two suggestions on the ballot…to which we will surely vote “NO.”

So if you and/or your kin were sober when the vote was cast to lower the commissioners’ salary and to pry the constitutionals off the county teet or you just feel pretty good about the outcome, call your commissioner. Tell him or her to send the CRC to the house and leave us and our votes alone.

To all the CRC Undoers, I believe Willie wrote a song just for you, too. Patsy Cline made it famous. You’ve probably heard it before…it’s called “Crazy.”